Materials. Part II.

Last week I wrote that Adrianne and I recently purchased a pre-K and a Kindergarten workbook. I mentioned the pre-K book was designed for children ages 3-5, while the Kindergarten book was for children between the ages of 5-6. I also mentioned that for those who do not have kids or are not around little kids enough to see a glaring problem staring them right in the face– there is one heck of a lot of difference between a three-year-old and a five-year-old!– that the book’s recommending starting age differed significantly. What I would like to add is that there is little difference between the pre-K book and the Kindergarten book. According to Scholastic, some three-year-olds are just as academically prepared to start Kindergarten as some five-year-olds. In addition, by age four, Scholastic believes, an able child could be prepared to complete the same instructional material as a first grader. This is mind-blowing to me!

According to iVillage, a web site that posts developmental stages of infants, toddlers, and youths, by four-years-old a child should be able to run, jump, walk and climb like the skills are second nature to them. Yet, standing on tiptoes or balancing on one foot probably still requires a child's full concentration. In contrast, by 5 ½ years old a child should be able to have the coordination and balance similar to that of an adult's. The child should be able to stand on his or her tiptoes, hop on one foot, do somersaults and maybe even skip. Tasks such as brushing his or her teeth and tying his or her shoe should be accomplished with little or no help from Mom or Dad. Do you see the problem? If not, let me spell it out for you. Scholastic, and every other homeschooling publication, secular and religious, believes the same toddler who has a difficult time standing on his or her tiptoes without fully concentrating on the task can still have the same cognitive ability as the youngster who can do somersaults! What am I missing? How can this disparity in abilities, physical verses cognitive, exist when what is being asked of our Kindergartener’s is so little?

I’ve been involved in education long enough to know that some 8th graders read at the 3rd grade reading level; and some high school students may never be able to read the simplest 8th grade books. What never occurred to me is how and when this ability gap first reared its ugly head. Sure, like everyone else I blamed “the earlier grades” and, especially, “parenting” as the primary causes of a schoolchild’s shortcoming, but … my God! How can parents allow their child to start pre-K or Kindergarten two or more years behind a fellow classmate? Aren’t colors, colors; shapes, shapes; numbers, numbers; and straight lines the same for everyone, everywhere? One does not need to have a degree to count aloud when walking down stairs with their child or ask what color the cat is, do they?

***

So what do I write now? Do I brag that Taylor knows her colors, can count to ten, and is working on her ABC’s? Do I boast that Simon has the vocabulary of some five-year-olds we’ve met at the park? Do I put other parents down for wasting so much time on themselves while ignoring their greatest responsibility– being a parent to their child? Do I blame the economy or our government for forcing would-be stay-at-home moms and dads into work instead of allowing them the gift of raising their own children, teaching them the skills every parent can impart onto their kids with a little concentration and time? God knows … I’m not perfect. But I guess that’s where this blog is going, or went. We know where our kids should be– physically and cognitively– or where we think they should be, and we are working on getting them to that quintessential point where they can start making decisions for themselves. We’ve chosen, although struggling severely for it now and probably for the rest of our lives, not to leave the responsibility for teaching our children basic educational skills to someone else or society at large. That’s what parenting is all about, right? Raising one’s children to the best of his or her abilities and utilizing all of one’s skills, knowledge, and resources to do the best job they can.

No one has ever said parenting is easy. There’s a reason for that– it isn’t!